Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Dear, John..

If you're reading this post, this is not an entry about soap.  There's still time to get out...

I'm remodeling my bathroom.  If you follow me on Facebook, you've no doubt seen me allude to such, with a picture thrown in, here and there, for good measure.  I've since been asked about it several times, so while the paint is drying on some mouldings, I thought I'd walk you through it.  I love a good project blog, don't you?

But first - the news at hand:  Have any of you guys been watching RuPaul's Drag Race? Because ya'll with dubious priorities need to contact your tv providers, order up the Logo channel and watch this mess, STAT.  Hys.  Terical.  The finale was last night, and I rooted my chosen queen on ferociously. While I really enjoy Adore Delano too (Anybody remember Danny Noriega from Idol?  - Totally him in a dress now), I was all-in for her biggest competition and the ultimate winner, my beloved Bianca Del Rio.  Not today Satan, Not today...

Now.  About that bathroom...

So you may or may not know that I moved here 3.5 years ago.  I forget what I blog about and the stories I tell, in my advanced years.  My house sits on an acre of land in rural Michigan.  The "thumb" area of the lower peninsula - because, by order of law, Michiganders are required to demonstrate where we live by pointing to our right palms.  The innards of my home needed some serious szhuzhing.  Though my house is relatively newish (2007), the builder opted for cheaper indoor finishes in an otherwise solidly constructed home.  The important things are top notch, but anything that served the purpose of "looks", sucked directly out loud.  I've remodeled 75% of it, but some of it is still a work in progress.  Don't even get me started on my kitchen cabinets.  The offending 2nd bathroom is located inside of our bedroom.  If you watch those home-improvement shows:  the "on-suite", if you're nasty.

And it was.

One can only describe the distinct heinousness of this particular powder room by just telling you that for 3 years, I shut the door and hoped to God, no two visitors had to pee at my house simultaneously.  I had other more pressing projects to handle before now, and it got put to the back of the pile.

The room itself is the size of a standard piece of copy paper.  There will be no expansive 6 man showers, or "dressing nooks" in this space.  The downside of this, is that I won't be able to install that $12,000 steam sauna in there that nobody in history ever uses or needs- but the upside is that I don't have to walk out into the hall to pee, in the middle of the night, with no pants on.  

Everything in this room cost .43 cents.  That's not to say that things need to be expensive.  'Cause Lord knows I'm a cheapass - from the godawful, builder-grade "oak" vanity, complete with peeling laminate top; to the vinyl flooring that Mary Magdalene my grandmother had in her kitchen.  The cherry on top of the crap sundae, is a 1980's rusty, make-up lighting-type fixture, with those twisty compact fluorescent bulbs stuck in it.  It has 76 cobwebs on it and makes your skin look like you have terminal liver disease.  I didn't get pre-demo photos.  I got carried away.  But you get the gist...

Ya ever see whats REALLY underneath your toilet?  It's not cute.

I already ranted about this on my Facebook page, but what kinda sadist GLUES ugly mirrors to walls?!  "Have fun repairing the sheetrock, suckahssss..."

So there it is....in all it's low-budge grandeur.  The new look I'm going for, is a modern traditional, monochrome, boudoir glam.  Sort of Pottery Barn Meets Adam Lambert.
Heh.  I know. You're just gonna hafta trust me.  I can't reveal too much just yet, because I want my sisters to see it in person before they judge me and tell me I've lost my damn mind....heh.  I will tell you that it didn't start off well.  I taped 3 to 1500 (who remembers?!) paint chips to the wall for a good month before finally choosing a shade of gray that I felt was a good fit for the "feel" I was trying to achieve.  I wanted a serene, airy mood and gray can go sideways very easily.  It can become battleship/purple/brown/blue/trashcan in the right light, so I obsessed at great lengths.  My medication will be in next week. ;)  In the end, in certain light, it has more of a bluish tint than I would have liked, and looks nothing like the paint chip.  I'm blaming the 12 year old at Lowes who mixed it.  I may have to find her car and slit her tires.  I'm resisting the urge to repaint though, hoping that once I install all the elements, I'll be too tired to care. it will all come together.

I chose the color Polished Silver for the walls and Homestead Resort Jefferson White (*side eye*) for the ceiling and trim.  For the flooring, I went back to the same brand of Morning Star strand bamboo I've used in my other bathroom.  This time, in Qing Kobra.  Hardwood is a big no-no in bathrooms because of the high moisture level,  but bamboo works well with a little care.  And it's gorg.  I'm in love with it.  Hubs and I installed it in about six hours.  He's the cut man, I'm the hammer chick. Here's a peek...



That's all for now....stay tuned for part 2....


  1. I haven't read a blog in ages. Probably because I haven't been making soap. But then yours pops up and I get to read something that's not about soap or eating healthy. yay! Gray is a super hard color to pick. I picked one for my former master bedroom and mine ended up more of a purple color. In the end, I just couldn't take it and painted it yellow a few years later. I peeked ahead and saw the finished look, but I will hold my comments (l love it!).

  2. If I had known what a PITA gray was before I did this, I'd have chosen something else! I dunno if I can take mine either!